


helping him heal

by sgrbunni



Series: baby banana [2]
Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Ash Lynx Needs A Hug, Canon Compliant, Childhood Trauma, Coping, Healing, Healthy Coping, Healthy Relationships, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Please Don’t Sexualize This, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Recovery, Recovery, sfw age regression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:15:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26932726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sgrbunni/pseuds/sgrbunni
Summary: Ash has never really let himself be so vulnerable.. let himself fall into mindset like this around someone else. But there was something about Eiji that always made things feel safer.( TW; mentions of Ash’s past )
Relationships: Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji
Series: baby banana [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1965190
Comments: 3
Kudos: 54





	helping him heal

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys !! this was a really big coping story for me and since i got so much positive feedback on my first banana fish agere fic , i decided to finally post !  
> ( TW mentions of Ash’s past , please be careful babes )

It was such a strange thing when someone seemingly so strong could let themselves appear vulnerable. At least from Ash’s perspective. He grew up with the lowest of the low. Running away at a young age only to be taken in by a man who would abuse him .. sell him.. hurt him in any way imaginable. He felt disgusted seeing himself become so weak minded , but it was necessary to forget the pain. Even if it was only for a moment. You see , Aslan would never admit this, but in passing he had once found a way of coping that was primarily used by victims of what had happened to him, and it managed to intrigue the teen enough to experiment.

Ash had found what was called ‘ age regression’ a coping in which someone would revert mentally back to a time where they were safe and away from all of the pain that had been inflicted upon them. They where stress free and would feel innocent once again. Of course with it , some people would bring it into the more promiscuous side of their life. Immediately hearing that, Ash wanted to be sick. These people where imitating why had brought him so much pain, they didn’t know what it was like to be a child and be hurt like that. They romanticized it, bringing a sense of sickness to his stomach. 

He dug up on what it was like to regress in his spare time away from all of the violence , he thought that maybe it would work for him... Luckily it had. Tonight he was off the streets, at home with no one more than just him and Griff, and Griff really couldn’t do anything so he didn’t worry much about letting himself be weak for just one night. Ash, though only having a pillow to hold onto and an old blanket from his childhood, slipped. His brain got foggy and his body felt small and frail, he wasn’t sure of how to process it all, but it was nice. He was comfortable and truly did feel safe. 

Though his headspace didn’t last long when he would regress. This routine continued , slowly items started to add up that would help him. But as he needed to regress more, the world around him only got more busy. Then came into his life a certain Japanese boy , Eiji Okumura. As soon as they met he knew he would give his life for Eiji, give the world for him. And though Eiji was another soft spot of vulnerability in his life.. he adored him, he couldn’t let him go. 

The teens lives only got stranger and stranger .. to the point where they felt they could only trust one another. Ash had just lost his best friend , Shorter , they had burned down Golzine’s mansion, and Aslan just really needed a break. But him and Eiji where together now, at the safe house , just the two of them. It felt like they could be hurt at any time, making Ash fidget with the bottom of his blue button up shirt. He had only just confessed all that had happened to him, curled up on Eiji’s lap as he cried. He begged for Eiji to stay with him, and he knew he would. After minutes of silent crying, Ash knew his brain was beginning to fog. ‘ no... no , not it front of eiji..’ He thought to himself , but the thoughts left quicker than they had arrived. 

Ash bolted up like a dart to look Eiji in the eyes , he seemed almost pleading. “ If I tell you something that helps me , you promise you won’t go ?” He asked quickly , earning a shocked look from the other teen. Eiji would never leave him in a heartbeat. “ I am never leaving Ash.. I told you this, you’re stuck with me.” He giggled softly , his english still broken with few errors in his pronunciation. Ash held he and Eiji’s hands together , giving a sigh before looking him back in the eyes. “ I regress .. mentally. Because of what happened to me .. I need a way to feel innocent , I need some way to forget. So my mind goes back to being a little kid.. barely a toddler.” He explained nervously. But Eiji didn’t fret. He just placed a gentle kiss on his partners forehead. 

“ So , what is it like regressed ?” Eiji questioned with a smile , he could never judge Ash for something like that. Besides .. the idea of ‘baby ash’ as he thought of him in his head , made Eiji’s heart warm to an unbelievable amount. The blonde’s wide eyed shone with wonder at how accepting Eiji was being. “ Well it’s starting to happen now..” he muttered , looking away in embarrassment. “ My voice gets softer , my head gets fuzzy and I feel physically small.. I just wanna be held .. I wanna be cared for like a parent would to their baby.” He explained in barely above a whisper. Though the statement made Eiji incredibly excited , he was going to get to care for Ash , help him in a peaceful way. “ I could be papa !” Eiji exclaimed in broken english, a bright smile upon his face , making Aslan all the more shy as he went back to his position of leaning against Eiji’s lap. “ I’d love that..” he muttered , giving his boyfriend the green light to let him be cared for. 

After more explanation and the retrieving of Ash’s box of items that helped him into this state , he was cuddled up to Eiji , eyes closed and face red. Though a soother was gently bobbing in his mouth , he still managed out some words. “ scary..” the younger of the two only muttered, hiding his plush cat up in front of his face to hide himself away. Though his regression was usually to forget what had happened to him. Sometimes , it would only make the thoughts more rampant , but easier to comprehend. “ Ei- Papa, help..” he whispered , his soft voice cracking in desperation. Eiji wasn’t sure of what to do immediately, thinking back on what Ash had told him he needed to be quick though, thinking back on how he cared for his sister when she was born. “ It’s going to be alright. Papa’s here..” Eiji said whilst gently petting his platinum hair. “ Papa always keeps you safe , doesn’t he ?” Which was right.. Though Ash usually did a lot of the defending, Eiji had never let him get hurt while he was around. Ash nodded lightly , wiping his eye with the back of his hand. 

The Japanese teens smile only increased when seeing Ash’s gentle mannerisms , This was his Ash. He didn’t want to hurt people , he didn’t want to be violent, it’s just what he felt like he knew. In reality , Ash Lynx was still nothing more than a scared child learning to heal at a slow pace. And this side of him reflected it perfectly. He wanted to be safe , small , cared for. Something he never got to experience in life. And Eiji swore he would protect this side of him to his best ability, whenever Ash needed care like this. He would gladly comply. 

Somehow , through Eiji’s quiet cooing and kind words. Ash calmed , finding his headspace peaceful once more. The thoughts of being hurt where gone, all he was able to focus on was his caregiver. His jade green eyes where fixated on Eiji’s features and he almost began babbling compliments out. Telling him he was loved and how beautiful Eiji was, all in an infantile manner. “ There’s my sweet baby , feeling all better..” Eiji laughed quietly , he knew Ash would never be able to behave this was with anyone else. But somehow, Eiji was different and he was slowly helping him heal. 


End file.
